The 9 Spiritual Laws of White Wine Pietists

Searching through the print archives of Issues, Etc., I came across this piece of solid gold. The article is a classic by apologist attorney Craig Parton. Parton describes a new breed of pietist that has invaded the church. Though he doesn't use the term "seeker-sensitive," Parton's description fits perfectly the emergent seeker-sensitive pietism that is creeping into our churches. Perhaps today we should call it "double latte pietism" or "Starbucks revivalism" given the penchant for the coffee house as the new revival tent.

Parton correctly identifies this pietism as a theology of glory that avoids the whole bloody mess of a theology of the cross:

Pietism is thus no longer championed by nerdy, pocket-pen-laden, Catholic-bashing, Louisiana Bayou Baptists who condemn dancing, drinking, smoking, and doing the Hoochy Coochy. The new white-wine pietists have few social hang-ups with alcohol, tobacco, or music. Pietism is cross-dressing in American Christian culture today in a way that would have been unthinkable to the pietists of twenty-five years ago. The new white-wine pietists are cotton-clad, jeep-owning preppies, football coaches of major powerhouses, Yuppies who know the difference between a Cabernet Sauvignon and a Chardonnay, and political insiders who walk through the halls of Congress comfortably with the New York Times under their arms.

Thus the cultural and social package in which pietism dresses in the 1990's is often dramatically different from that which initially arose in reaction to the Reformation of the sixteenth century. But while the package is much different today, the theology of pietism remains, incredibly, unaltered. That manmade theology (what Luther called a theology of glory) was created by the first Adam while in rebellion in the garden and continues to this very day with its proclamation of the redeeming power of the law. Theologia gloria remains an enemy of the theologia crucis (theology of the cross). It must be vigilantly identified, scoped, and slain in every generation if our Lord is to find faith when he returns.

Thus the greatest threat to the church today is not from the ACLU, Martin Scorsese, The New Age Movement, Gangsta Rap, Planned Parenthood, Time-Warner, Madonna, Congresswoman Pat Schroeder, or Hugh Hefner. The greatest threat is a crossless pietism that has been given luxury-box seating within the walls of the church militant. It is a crossless pietism with confidence in the old Adam and in the life-giving power of the law. It is, though, the old, dank, putrid theology of glory now in the guise of dominion politics, or the seven promises of a promise keeper, or yielded or victorious living, or traditional family values, or any other appeal to life and salvation not centered in the daily inglorious and lowly forgiveness of sins found only in Christ's atoning death. The new white-wine pietists are lethal because they don't look, smell, dress, or socialize like the pietists of old. They are, however, enemies of the theologia crucis.

For the complete article, see The New White-Wine Pietists